You cannot win love.
“I cannot live without them”, this is love for many. ‘Them’ usually represents a lover or one’s family. For a lot of people, ‘them’ is the end of their world and the centre of their universe. In times when everything seems to be going fine they joke and complain that ‘them’ can never be pleased. When something goes wrong they swim in the guilt that they didn’t do enough for ‘them’.
Your lover or your family is not a stress ball. Never forget that somebody is not just your family or your lover. Love is a common plane on which a group of individuals agree to operate upon.
But what is love? A basic requirement for love is affection; this is the child plane. You can relate this to the sentiment towards a little child. But this alone does not qualify to be love. On the second plane, love is nurturing; this is the garden plane. Here there is pruning and watering. Love, on its third plane, is devotional; this is the servant plane. Here you look at the one you love as your master. On the fourth plane, love is protection; this is the warrior plane. Here you fight for what you love. There is a fifth plane; nothing can be told about this. Now, examine your
life. Are you in love? If yes is truly your answer, you are blessed. The Universe bows down to you. For the others, now you know what love is, don’t you?
Leave the wretched ideas about love that you hold on to. Love is not a need, it is a plane. Love is not a state, it is action. Love is not silent, it is expressive. To be in love, you have to meet on that plane every day; as a child and a parent, as a plant and the gardener, as the servant and the master, as the precious and the protector. Nobody can play only one part. Your lover, your family, etc can train you in this love. But they are not the end of it, and they are not its centre either. You are forever its core and it’s finiteness; go all the way.
Swastham Shantam Sampurnam